LunixFrom WhatPort80(Redirected from Linux)
 Lunix is one of the most powerful contraceptives evar. The moar one learns about lunix, the moar powerful its fertility-stealing powers become. It is recommended that you try lunix, since everyone knows your gonads are made of fail. About Lunix is an operating system that was the result of really crappy reverse-engineering efforts to create a free version of UNIX. Linus Torvalds and Alan Cox are the perpetrators behind this travesty. Tons of people use it, especially hippies, and no one really likes it except the terminally uncool. Most of them use it in violation of SCO's intellectual property rights. To use Lunix legally, one must pay a $699 license fee to SCO for each processor that runs the Lunix kernel. Lunix, like the Macintosh, attracts legions of fanboys. These penguinistas form communities that are irresistible to trolls. Though especially rabid on defense, penguinistas can rarely give it as good as they take it. Lunix trolls, in the guise of advocacy, often go to other communities to evangelize about Lunix on the slimmest pretense. Unlike most drama, the flame wars between OS advocates aren't entertaining. Lunix users say it is more secure, this is true, as Windows is like a car with no locks. Lunix, on the other hand, is like a car with a billion locks, so when you want to do something, you have to type your root password a million times. In essence it is also like a car with no stereo or even tires so even if it could be hacked it would be pointless to do so. As such, it is entirely useless. Lunix is the communist or anarchist version of Microsoft. Leftards love it and Rightards love to laugh when they see it trying too hard. Here is the mascot ToxThe mascot of Lunix is a fat stoner penguin named "Mister Tox" (from "toxic"). Tox is the hero of those who want to go through life sitting around with a huge gut full of semi-digested fish (too many bongs will give you a big appetite, I guess.) Linus Torvalds picked out a penguin to be the mascot, because all the good ones were already taken. Did I mention he smells like a yak? Types of Lunix Users    PenguinistasA penguinista is a Lunix user who hides the fact that he dual boots into Windows to play Doom. During his free time, he tries to write a program that will make Windows programs run natively in Lunix. This will never happen. Some people have come close, but by the time they have 16 bit Windows emulated everyone else has moved on to 64 bit Windows. Oh yeah... they also use GIMP to collect welfare. What using Lunix will not do for you, although if you use it enough you might believe these to be the case
Fun things you can do on Lunix
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