Toolbox

Pokémon

From WhatPort80

longchu is looooong

Pokémon (also known as Pokeymanz, and the enemy of Digimon) started out as a simple Nintendo game on the gameboy where the player takes the role of a 10 year old boy who gets kicked out of his mother's house and recruited by an ancien scientist to catch 151 super-powerful monsters, a few of which nobody was sure even existed. The games got so popular they spawned sequels and spinoff games, an animé, a trading card game, and a cult-like following of twelve year old boys who wish they could be thrown out of their house to walk in wild forests and throw by wild creatures. Thanks to how old it is, Pokémon enjoys continued popularity from nostalgia, even making it popular to the Internet Hate Machine of 4chan.

Video Games

1st Generation

The game originally started in Japan with Green and Red versions. When people started enjoying making magical monsters fight each other in turns, Nintendo released a Blue version with updated things. These are recognized by many long-time players as the high point of the games career because they were in black-and-white and all the music was beeps and boops.
Nintendo soon released a Yellow version, which took away the ability to choose your own starting Pokémon and instead stuck you with a Pikachu. For some reason, the designers found the game would be more fun with a yellow rodent following you around. This added a whole new feature where you could talk to your Pikachu to see how much he enjoyed your company.

2nd Generation

Gold and Silver added 100 new Pokémon to the already too many to actually catch number of 151, and a whole new region to explore and get lost in. This is perhaps the highest point of Pokémon's popularity, and is considered THE BEST of the series. Crystal was soon released; a slightly updated version with more focus on an underplayed legendary Pokémon and the ability to play as a girl, as well as a tower devoted to Pokémon battling where everyone was stronger than you.

3rd Generation

Ruby and Sapphire was seen by veteran players of the series as the beginning of a long decline. The gameplay wasn't bad, but lacked the retro feel of the old games. On top of which, another 100 Pokémon were added, making any hope of catching them all slip away into the realms of Unrealistic Expectations. An Emerald version was soon released, but it did not add much of anything and is nearly not even worth mentioning.
Due to incompatibility with previous generation games, Nintendo remade the original Green and Red versions so players could obtain the original 151 from the first generations. Dubbed FireRed and LeafGreen, these also added a few Pokémon from the second generation, complete with prettied-up graphics, remixed music, and some islands that nobody cares about.
Two other games for the Nintendo Gamecube were released as part of the third generation, but nobody knows about that because everyone had a PS2 instead.

4th Generation

The latest installments of the never ending series was Diamond and Pearl, which, just like its predecesors, added 100 more Pokémon, and a new uber-legendary called Arceus, which 13-year-old boys everywhere worship as their God. They soon released an updated version called Platinum, with all the features that should've been included in all previous versions.
HeartGold and SoulSilver, remakes of Gold and Silver, have been announced and will be released sometime in March 2010.

5th Generation

OH YES. Announced February 2010, it is expected that there will be in excess of 600 total Pokemon

It. Never. Freaking. Ends.

How to Play

Choose your gender
Pick a name
Get Mudkipz
Pwn noobs
Capture Pokémon
Repeat steps 4 and 5 until you become Champion and catch them all
????
PROFIT

The Anime

what is this i dont even

The Pokémon anime tells the story of Ash, whose hollow life is devoted entirely to catching Pokémon for an old professor. He travels the land with a Barack Obama look-alike who can't handle himself around women, and an annoying red-headed girl who won't get over the fact that Ash trashed her bike in the first episode. Occasionally, he is pursued by Jessie and James, two expert criminals who repeatedly try to steal Ash's pikachu, but always fail.
Over time characters will appear and dissapear, even main characters will dissapear from the show time after time; you don't know who's who anymore and you may as well just give up trying to follow their individual series. On top of which, there's the 12 movies with thinly-veiled repetitive storylines and suddenly you don't know what's what with the show anymore.
The earlier episodes of the show are loved for nostalgia value, whereas the newer episodes tend to be more vulnerable to Rule 34.

Fansites

Typical Pokémon fansite.

Back in the 1990s, everyone had their own Pokémon fansite on Geocities, consisting of several animated images and the perfect combination of the words "Master," "Ultimate," "Legendary," and an arbitrarily chosen Pokémon mascot. These fansites come complete with instructions on how to get Mew and Pikablu in the games, Pokémon crossover fanfiction Pokémon, and in-depth discussions on AshxLugia shipping.

The Internet currently holds the yet-to-be-deleted remnants of these fansites, as well as the Pokémon wiki Bulbapedia, and multiple versions of serebii.net. Pokémon fans also seem to think people are interested in watching 10-minute YouTube videos of messing around with a Pokémon game and a cheat device.

4Kids and Pokémon USA Drama

The Pokémon anime was originally dubbed for US distribution by 4Kids. Several of these episodes were not aired by 4Kids for multiple varying reasons, some of which include Japanese culture, James showing off fake breasts, and Porygon-induced seizures. This topic is taken very seriously by fanboys, and some are known to rant for hours on their fansites or online journals.

Eventually, Pokémon USA stepped in and yanked the animé away from 4Kids. All of the fans who had previously whined about how 4Kids was ruining the series now acted like it was the end of the world due to the voice artists being replaced, setting up at least 100 online petitions to reinstate the old voices. Even better, one of their original voice actors, Eric Stuart (who did James and Brock) posted about the voice actor changeover on his website, whining like a 13-year-old boy and spamming his own guestbook out of rage.

IRL Controversies

Many over-protective parents claim that Pokémon is harmful to their children, since it promotes fighting and similarly violent hobbies, as well as encouraging the unholy practice of summoning demons to settle childhood disputes.
Creationists complain that Pokémon teach children only about the theory of evolution, and not about the alternate theory of intelligent design. Ironically, Pokémon has their own all-powerful being that created all the universe, and is an evolutionary ancestor of all Pokémon.
Uri Geller tried to sue Nintendo over Kadabra, because it holds a spoon.
Jynx used to be black but was changed to purple due to complaints.
Pokemon has been banned in Saudi Arabia for promoting zionism and gambling.

Pokémon Memes

Shiny Pidgey

A meme that comes from a copypaste on /b/ about a boy who lost his girlfriend because he found a shiny Pidgey. Pidgies aren't rare, but a shiny Pokémon is as rare as the Gameboy can handle, and as the boy encountered the Pidgey, he didn't realize that his girlfriend was crying over the fact that her cat was dead, so he shouted "AW HELL YEAH I LOVE THIS". Her girlfriend, in a fit of rage throw his Nintendo DS to the wall, making the boy shout at her, forcing her to run out of the house crying.

Magikarp

Don't kick this guy around.

The worst pokemon in the game. It evolves into Gyarados at level 20, but until then it is absolutely useless. The image in question is quite hilarious to Pokémon players, and you can even get it on T-shirts now.

Mudkips

Main article: Mudkips

Slowpoke

Main article: Slowpoke

Gardevoir

Main article: Gardevoir

Shaymin

What do you call a fake based on a fake that's faked from a fake? A Metafake?

Not too long ago, a deviantART user and her friends played a massive prank on the internets by drawing a fake picture of an alternate form (or "forme," as Pokémon spells it) for the legendary Pokémon Shaymin, and posted it on /v/ after printing it out, putting some japanese writing on it and taking a photo. Within a mere 24 hours it went across the Internet and caused massive drama, even getting Rule 34 after only 2 hours. The whole thing was a source of lulz.

Lucario

The Krystal of the Pokémon fandom, lusted after by almost every furry in the world. It is most recognized for it's appearance in the most recent release of Super Smash Bros.

Pikaman

What has science done?

I'm dying squirtle

PokeGallery

Ash Ketchum IRL

Pikachu IRL

What Diglett looks like underground

Bust a move yo!

Proof that Pikachu is female.	Basic plot of every Pokémon episode ever.		The Pokémon wiki was deemed too unserious, and was repossessed by Jimbo Wales
Harry Pokemon	Deformation of character.	Pokémon is also a Japanese airline	TYPE: Beak (Normal/Flying)
Magikarp, the best Pokémon to use in the games. Use Splash, it's super effective!	Pirgacheew